All Eyes on Willie Revillame

Just recently, someone posted a video at YouTube showing the purported scam being done by Willie Revillame for Wowowee. I’m not a film editor or something and so a lot of things could escape my 20/20 vision on-screen. However, should this indeed be a “modified” video created by malicious parties attempting to malign ABS-CBN with the lowest of the low (Do I already sound like a Kapamilya Spokesperson?), I must say the graphic artist or whatnot who did this produced a great job.

It looks real. It looks genuine. It looks convincing.

This so-called Wowowee scandal has already passed ever since Mr. Joey de Leon lambasted Willie at his own noontime show at GMA, Eat Bulaga! Now, with stronger evidence (are videos still admissible in courts?), just imagine the fiery words that would come out of Joey by noon tomorrow. This time around, a major percentage who were at Willie’s side (were there any?) will be backing you up.

ABS-CBN, you are already full of shit. Make your company less dirty and get rid of Willie Revillame. The notion that he is still hosting your shows (and getting paid to fool the poor) really dumbfounds me. Logic escapes me. Your newscasters at Bandila are so quick to question irregularities in the government yet your house sponsors the acts of Willie? How many other shows are there that caters to this kind of culture? Is your corporate social responsibility or plain old-time ethics all out of the window?

Should you not be genuinely concerned about what is right or wrong, well just pull-out Willie or the entire show for the sake of good marketing. I accept that sometimes, I am very totalitarian and the way I market things may not only be uncanny but ruthless at least, but I will not and refuse to stoop at Willie’s level.

Anyway, stop this foolishness once and for all. If you don’t care about the people you are fooling, then care about your ratings or your profits! Acting slow is not acting at all on this matter at hand. Think of all the other companies, even bigger than yours, that fell on their knees because they refused to accept defeat. Think about Tylenol in the USA or Union Carbide’s leaking gas disaster in 1984 (are you guys aware of these incidents?) and be reminded that refusing or ignoring little bush fires can end so much bigger.

Mr. Lopez, you are at the onset of becoming historic and classical examples of PR and marketing. Are you gonna be a failure or a victor of circumstance? It’s your call. But whichever path you take, rest assured that given the intensity and clamor these videos may produce (YouTube is YouTube), this is gonna be a great case study for years and years to come.

Tapefailure is Bad Branding

I received this auto-email from the founder of a website that I rarely ever use (should I have used it at all):

Unfortunately, at the end of this month Tapefailure will be closing its doors. Why? Due to both lack of funding and a need to rebuild the system in a more stable manner.

The technology is definitely viable, but the current function of the Tapefailure system isn’t quite there yet. There are a number of things that need to be redeveloped and redesigned from the bottom-up.

During 2008, I will be working to rebuild Tapefailure with a stronger set of features, a new look, and a new name. I will also be looking to introduce even more innovative analytics methods in the new service.

I would like to thank all my customers for their continued support and patronage and I can only hope that you will join me again when the new service is launched.

Thank you,
Joshua Gross
Tapefailure Founder

Talk about the power of branding.

Nissin versus Monde Nissin

Who’s the ad agency for Nissin? Anybody? Anybody? Anybody who wants to claim and erect their flag? Anyway, I heard that “dalagang bukid” ad sometime last week (only had the time to make a blog entry today) and I just want to congratulate you for wasting your client’s money at the same time, accepting defeat.

You might as well sent a memo to Nissin or a white hanky (dalagang bukid)!

*****PLEASE FOCUS YOUR ATTENTION HERE*****

“No one can make you feel inferior without your permission.” — Eleanor Roosevelt

*****PLEASE FOCUS YOUR ATTENTION HERE*****

Goddamit people. You creatives, you! How many times do I have to spread the word that name-calling is just so P-A-T-H-E-T-I-C!. Love Radio did it, Nike did it, now Nissin? Arghh! I know, I know, the paper cup thing is just so stupid. It tries to what, save the environment? Like do you expect me, say a call center agent, to wash that paper cup thing, let it dry, and then take it home? Reuse, reduce, recycle? How is it recyclable then? As a second degree paper? Shall I expect this bowl I am using now to end up at Sterling? If that’s the case, what you did was just novelty. Novelty that forgot to keep in mind that noodles have to be eaten hot. Well, at some point, way to go, Nissin, but not quite.

Monde Nissin, nice try, but it’s nothing to go ga-ga about. Worse, you’re in Catch-22. The stupid concept works, hurray for you. But don’t bet your balls on it. If it fails, you cannot revert to plastic. It’s admitting defeat. In fact, you have to go all the way with other noodle brands to support you ideas. If not, it’s like a faggot bisexual. 50% we’re into green-thinking, 50% we’re not, really.

Nissin, you still suck. But good news, you can pass on the blame to your ad agency. Now, can anyone tell me who made that ad?

Globe Sucks!

I have always been a Globe-user. Though Smart undoubtedly has the lead now in the mobile telecom industry, no one can question the prestige and premium-feeling attached to Globe. In fact, Globe is almost a quasi-love mark. When Sun Cellular came, I almost made the switch, but later on, I decided to stay. After all, I realized that for some reason, the touch of the Ayalas’ always had a tinge of gold (with the exception of Touch Mobile or TM).

Anway, aside from the fact that I thought leaving Globe would make me so “masa”, I did not switch to Sun because at that time, they began offering their Unlimitxt service. I really loved this counter-offer which not only made me refuse to switch but decrease my use of Chikka as well. That’s why I got really pissed when Globe cut down Unlimitxt and offered the scheming Unlitxt services instead. That issue was so hot that the likes of TxtPower filed a compliant against them (I’m unsure if they won though).

Now, it seems like Globe has once again felt the need for greed. Just like the Grinch, they have now popped the already dampened Christmas spirits of the Filipinos (read as Glorietta Bombing Explosion, Stronger Peso (Weaker OFW Purchasing Power), Manila Pen Siege) by now scrapping Unlitxt and offering the shrewder (read as garapal) Sulitxt service.

I have been informed by my trusted sources that this move is only temporary. This is just a way to control their gross profit during Christmas. We all know how many SMS we Pinoys send daily. Multiply it by a million and you can just imagine how many texts there are in the airwaves come Christmas. And so, the Globe guys just did the math and - voila - Sulitxt.

Honestly, this is just bad marketing. Even though Globe might be pure at heart and intentions as an organization, I can still foresee this Sulitxt thing becoming permanent. And so, as a form of appreciation for all the business Pinoys have given to Gglobe for the rest of the year, why can’t Globe just absorb temporary loss and be fair (the way it was before)?

So why delay the inevitable? Let Sulitxt be permament as early as now! As for all other consumers like moi who are so sick and tired of all these crap, let us all switch to Sun Cellular as soon as possible! This time, I swear Mr. Gokongwei, you can count on a new subscriber on me come January 2008. Just promise mo though you will not follow Mr. Ayala and Mr. Pangilinan’s paths.

Anyway, guys and girls of all ages. Why not give SUN PREPAID SIM CARDS on Christmas Day? It’s very cheap and, given the situation, will be deeply appreciated! Heck, I’d be more than happy if I received one myself! To guys at Sun Cellular, feel free to follow my this idea! Hahaha!

Has Megaworld Gone Mad?

Honestly, does that look classy to you? I’m no A/B yet, but based on my own humble honest opinion, that thing I encircled at the upper left is in direct contrast to that thing I emphasized at the lower right. This raised the alarm for me as I asked myself, and my friends who didn’t really care at all: HAS MEGAWORLD GONE MAD?

Or perhaps, is this another wonderful output of their award-winning creative slash advertising agency, if ever they have one?

What in the world were they thinking? That smiley icon is so out of place! Aren’t they well-aware now with the symbolisms that appeal to the broad spectrum of our consuming public? It’s like, Kia versus BMW. LG (haha!) versus Nokia Motorola! Sharon Cuneta versus Love Anover? Josh Groban versus April Boy Regino!

Worse, they even had to repeat that awful “logo” all over the place. Eek, are you committing professional hara-kiri whoever you are? What the hell were YOU thinking? Anyway, I was also able to pass by the location earlier today and I got to read the slogan of the that ambitious project from Megaworld. It goes: The art of living life extraordinarily well.

I am not so sure if I got the whole sentence correct (I have the attention span of a goldfish for stupid ideas) but I am so sure about the last 2 words. GREENbelt Excelsior. The art of living life EXTRAORDINARILY WELL. Like what? Are you from Benilde or something? Well, if you are one of those MMAs who presented that stupid idea, come on, you can do better than that! Otherwise, I guess it is true what they say. Graduates from Benilde are stupid.

P.S. This is twice an insult if you come from another school. And yes, I felt the need to explain the punch-line to you!

A Business Proposal

I have a 64-page business plan (technically it’s just a marketing plan ~updated 06 June 2008). I know some people are not into it. Some people are so into it. So if you’re either (I could always tell you I don’t have any. Hehehe!), and is into extreme investing, why not hit me back before someone else does?

The big idea I have is for a start-up Internet slash Dotcom 2.0 slash software company. Rest assured this is not a Facebook or YouTube or Alibaba wannabe. The idea is alsmost original (some aspects does utilize social networking, 2.0 hello!?), and I honestly have put my heart and soul into the documents especially the financial portion.

So if you’re like me and you dream of ruling the world, just give me cash, and I’ll do the rest.

Going Down with Branders.com

Branders.com used to be a pride and joy for Filipinos. In fact, marketing guru Al Ries praised the dear website for having what it takes to survive in the cutthroat world of e-commerce during his visit here last June 23, 2006 at the Westin Philippine Plaza. Unfortunately, Branders.com seems to be like any other child wonder (think Shaira Luna and the rest of the Promil Kids) for this so-called marketing wonder is slowly fading into the background.

Look at their Alexa stats recently and you’ll realize they’re about to go down. What ever happened to the Evil Marketing Genius? Did he or she fail? With the amount I assumed you pay this so-called EMG (you pay really well, right?), is this person following the steps of whoever is behind Chikka or Auction.ph?

Well, yeah, National Pen is also still in the dust. In fact, I am so unsure if they ever functioned at all. Haha. But then, being a genius does NOT give you the license to use industry troubles as an excuse.

Now, what should Branders.com do? Since all eyes are on China right now, it’s more difficult than ever for mere middlemen to survive. I mean, for B2B requirements, Alibaba reigns supreme. So unless Americans are really THAT dumb or THAT lazy or simply THAT unconcerned about saving a few thousand bucks or so as long as they do their own ordering, well Branders.com may still have a future.

However, if more and more companies at the East- and West Coast become more knowledgeable about how to get directly in touch with a certain Mr. Lee in Shanghai, what’s stopping them from ordering through Alibaba and skipping Branders.com altogether?

Well, a simple answer would be CUSTOMER SERVICE. We all know that in this realm, anything coming from China does not seem to come with a sufficient warranty. And so, this could be Branders.com’s edge. Unfortunately, having personally ordered through Branders.com, I must say that their service sucks. The shipment came delayed, uber delayed. Worse, the after-sales service was non-existent. But lo and behold, they have the nerve to contact me recently to ask if I am doing any corporate Christmas shopping come Holidays 2007.

Customer Service is your one and only hope, EMG. A certain company may not value it that much but that does not make it less important. Alibaba may be able to improve it for their own site, but surely not at the level of the other hundreds or thousands of Chinese suppliers listed in their website. Thus, by putting a premium on things such as warranty and whatnot, you can justify a higher price. Now, then, it doesn’t take a rocket scientist an Evil, Marketing Genius to figure that one, right?